This is not a motivation

Happy New Year! 

Resolutions are not disappointing.

You know, I initially wanted to vent out my frustrations today. But I realized that it's not even a week into 2016 and I'm already angsty. Then, I remembered that I don't have my resolutions yet. Then I remembered again that I loathe resolutions cause I never accomplish them anyway.

So, let's not do anything crazy this year. Spare me the unnecessary heartbreak. 

1) Graduate school (with pretty colours)

No-brainer, really. I need to go get my diploma after this if I ever want to go anywhere. 

2) EXO'luxion

I'm cheating a little with this one. I already bought the tickets. However, the fact that I'm going on my own is something to be proud of. Bracing the stampede of EXO fangirls should be on the list of scary adventures. 

3) Making full use of my planner

I bought a cute ass planner this year. It's from Sanrio with a Hello Kitty pixel on the front. But that's besides the point. While I was referring to my 2015 planner to check on any tasks that needs to be brought forward, I saw how much things I've written. Every nitty-gritty detail that should never be seen by another human being (hahah) was written in there and I thought to myself, "Wow, I made through all of these." 

And it's just a really nice thing to read at the end of the year. I showed it to my mom and she just brushed it off like it wasn't important. So that's another thing I learnt. Never show your personal demons to others because they don't care. No matter how difficult it was for you, only you would understand. No point sharing it with another because it hurts to know that you don't matter. Let's not hurt yourself so early in the year.

4) Fill up my bookshelves

It should be pretty easy, this one. My shelves are nowhere near empty, but there's a couple of shelves that is sadly bare. I'm looking into buying more mangas this year since I'm lacking in them. I read a lot online but most of the ones I've read are licensed in English so I wanna support the industry. 

5) Lose xx kg

This is laughable because I don't feel like losing weight. I mean, for whose benefit? For mine, yes, I know and I shouldn't take this lightly since I am too heavy for my short height. However, I don't feel particularly disgusted with myself right now. But this is for the clothes I can't fit, the people who are rude, the family who won't stop reminding me. 

I'm starting this the wrong way definitely but it's still a motivation, no? 

The last resolution is so cliché but meh.

All the best to everyone and all the best to me. God knows we all need something to push us forward. 

x